Category: Inspiration

  • 1 thing could ruin that perfectly planned out date

    He kept talking nonstop that at some point he didn’t know when few grains of rice fell off from his mouth to the table.

    He realized what happened and silently prayed that she didn’t notice and went on

    “Oh, God!” She almost fainted when she saw what happened and couldn’t stop the irritation that appeared on her face. She just kept quiet, faced her plate, and waited for this date to come to an end.

    They continued having light conversations while she was eating with her fork and knife. Even though she wasn’t used to eating that way. She used her knife to slice through the Chicken on her plate and tried holding it with the fork when the Chicken flew up, hit her forehead, and fell on the floor far beside their table.

    The room feels silent as everyone turned to their direction. All eyes were on her oil-stained forehead and the Chicken on the floor (laughs). Some tried to hide their laugher others couldn’t.

    She covered her face in shame and didn’t know which direction to face. The embarrassment was just too much to handle.
    “So much for a perfect date”. She mumbled.

    Grabbed her bag and left with face down as people’s gazes followed her to the door.

    After getting all your feedback on our last post on genotype I realized that some people in relationships have no idea about their partner’s genotype. It can be as a result of ignorance and nonchalant ness and it can also be as a result of blindness.

    Blinded by the unrealistic assumption we have of them and more receptive to the perfect side they portrayed.

    Yes! When we like someone we accept whatever we see and react positively to it. We cling to the perfect perception we have of them than anything else may not matter at the moment.

    When they open their mouth and we hear how smooth and neat their English is, we also become forced to be like them and try to speak adequately as well that we end up ruining everything in the process.

    Madam/ Oga stick to your pidgin or local dialect if that’s what you know how to speak.

    When you see how handsomely dressed he looks, you try to look sophisticated as well by wearing a very tight gown and long heels, that your zip may get broken and you end up ruining your ankle.

    And if she’s looking so stylish and chic, you go and wear the fine shoe that you stopped wearing years ago because you had outgrown it. Afterwards you come back with more pain and blisters all over your foot.

    You trade your comfortability for barely what you think the other person is; Someone with no shortcomings.

    Stop making unrealistic assumptions.

    It’s because of those assumptions that your new relationship comes to an end even before it starts.

    Because she’s looking so fresh, you think she can’t fart, or get messy. And because he is in money, you think he’d have table manners and eat like a king.

    Those things are just what you see on upfront and they are unrealistic.

    You focus on that and forget that there are other crucial things to talk about when you first meet, like dreams, purpose, faith, family, health, genotype etc

    The more vital things you neglect because of your unrealistic presumptions, the more you destroy your chances of making things work.

    Let your personality be on full display from the moment you get talking with the other person.

    Let your true self do the talking. And don’t let the other person think that you’re not expressing your true self.

    Be real.

    Because assumptions can ruin it even before it begins.

    P/S – One time I kept trying to form Queens English while on a date since the guy was speaking so well that I eventually gave up and switched to pidgin. Laughs

    Drop a comment and tell me some of those things you’ve done just to make sure you don’t embarrass yourself in front of your date.

  • GUEST POST: EMOTIONAL CONDOM

    Its such a miracle how God uses the simplest silliest things *laughs* to inspire us and leave us perplexed at his wisdom. That was what happened with this post.

    My featured guest blogger this week is; Ebisidor Ann Azu.

    BioEbisidor Ann has been a blogger for some time now, she is also a teen coach, mentor, author and the mouthpiece of The Siaisiai Ebisidor Foundation. (A movement that puts smiles on the faces of children as we put them in classrooms). She is passionate about healthy relationships, people living their best life the way God intended and lifting children up to love and growth. She blogs passionately at www.talk2ebijanded.com you should go see what she’s up to.

    This is what she shares;

    Can I have a condom please?
    If you had bagged some negative acts/dramas last year 2019, fall in here and read this piece. Trust me, it’s not that deep but it’s a must read so as to have a better 2020.

    When Chika, reached out to me in respect to featuring me on her blog, the issue on getting what to write on bothered me. I thought to myself,what on earth can I possibly write on; it just popped up to write on emotional condom.

    As we know that condom is a cool protection used when having sex and it’s basically against sexually transmitted diseases or unwanted pregnancy as the case may be.

    Today, I’ll be writing on emotional condom. Protecting yourself from emotional stress,issues, dramas this year.

    An emotional condom is the mental parallel to the physical condom – an actual condom keeps your sexual organs from getting damaged, an emotional condom keeps your heart and mind from getting damaged.

    Last year, I personally did not use this condom and a whole lot happened to me… Trust me, I know better now. It is my responsibility to get an emotional condom for myself to have a cool year. You should too!

    *An Emotional condom in respect to relationship (Friendship or dating)*

    When you don’t trust a friend enough to let them get close to you.

    When to wear a “friendship condom”?

    When you are still friends but you don’t open up to them or get close emotionally in fear of them being fake with bad intentions. You must be careful trust me.

    When to wear a “dating condom”?

    My darling, you must be more careful. You should know by now with all the experiences you’ve had that you’re not a trash spot. If they are not making conscious effort to be in your life, please leave them with no second thought. It’s your life you know. Better to be alone than be emotionally messed up.

    I remember a friend of mine that cried a number of times because the love cards did not favour her… The only advice I could think of giving her was to allow love be for now, be whole as a single, find new ways to loving herself more and somehow, love would find her. This worked for me though and I pray it does for her.

    Come to think of it, this piece is not strictly on emotions only, you can apply it to physical, psychological, and financial aspects of your life. The most important thing is that the condom is used.

    This year 2020,don’t go everywhere…

    Don’t do everything…

    Don’t allow everything…

    Ensure that you are emotionally protected. Learn to say no when you need to.

    Do not trade your happiness for anything.

    Stay alone if it gives you peace of mind.

    Read good books and keep good company.

    Invest and help humanity this year.

    From my janded empire,I wish you a 2020 of progress and good tidings. Cheers.

    If this post has inspired you, don’t leave without dropping a lovely comment for Ebisidor and a comment to encourage others. God bless you. Hugs xoxo.

  • Try erasing those mistakes again; I have a surprise for you.

    *laughs* You’re probably going to make the same mistake I just did. The funny thing is that we already have at the back of our mind that we are in the new year and the new decade. I mean some of us have laid out new year resolutions, visions, plans, scheduled events, hangouts, to do and do nots etc. Some have been singing 2020 since the month of September last year.

    So why then do more than half of the world’s population end up making this same mistake?

    Because changes are inevitable and we must adjust to them whether we like it or not and whether we are prepared for it or not.

    So I’m leaving you with this. This year comes with the full package of everything. I’m not going to beat my chest and tell you its all going to be all rosy and cozy. No. Like every other year its going to come with uncertainties. The best would be to be prepared but sometimes we don’t see the back of the dress we wear to know if it fits properly, so when those changes come, weather good or bad. Rise above those changes. Don’t run. Don’t hide. Don’t give excuses. Don’t shy away. Handle them. Handle those changes with God and a sound mind. Keep writing 2020 till no one notices 2019 was once written before No matter how many erasers break keep erasing it till it turns out perfect.

    Keep erasing the bad habits, garbages, negativity, low self esteem till you see the picture of the ‘you’ you’ve always envision to see radiate so brightly.

    PS – Don’t be shocked that I don’t have new year resolutions, or a list of how my last year went. The truth is what I’m going to tell you is not enough compared to what these four persons are going to share with you on the blog this month.

    Yes!!

    You heard right. I’ll be featuring four guest post from four people that made my year one of growth and daring to take chances. These people have blessed me with their wealth of knowledge, their expertise and their story, and I want you to get what I got, to see/feel the impact they’ve impacted and to learn what I have learnt from them. I’ll be posting each post every Friday in this month of January. So watch out for my next post this Friday and other posts to come.

    Thank you.

    Don’t stop sharing, liking and commenting on each post. Much love xoxo.